Burning-Match -derek-GaveyMonday Morning Match is a quick post – maybe a quote, inspirational story or idea – intended to spark some motivation inside each of you so your week gets off to a fantastic start on Monday morning.

“Now On the Tee…”

Sunday afternoon was supposed to be the day my daughter Riley and her Upper Arlington High School girl’s golf team played Muirfield Village Golf Club. The private golf club in Dublin, Ohio that has hosted The Memorial Tournament since 1976 was designed by Jack Nicklaus who also played his high school golf at Upper Arlington was hosting the Golden Bear Invitational. Sadly, due to inclement weather that included a full day of rain, the event had to be cancelled.

When the event was first announced to the girls, Riley showed no emotion either way. To her it was just another tournament at just another golf course. Then when she learned about the history and meticulous condition of the Muirfield Village course, she started getting excited…and anxious about playing this course. Some of the greatest players in the world have struggled to break par on this course so how could a 15-year-old, still learning the game, handle it for 18 holes without a physical or emotional breakdown?golf team

As an avid golfer myself, I have played numerous courses that have hosted a PGA Tour event or professional golf major including Pebble Beach, Harbour Town Golf Links, Oakland Hills and TPC Sawgrass. I also had the opportunity to play Muirfield Village Golf Club back in the 80’s as part of the U.S. Junior Tournament regional qualifier. I shared my excitement for Riley’s opportunity because I was both proud of her and her teammates as well as jealous that they would get to walk the fairways that golf’s greatest of the modern era have walked.

Each day the tournament drew closer, the bigger the opportunity to play this incredible course became. Until Saturday, Riley was nervous of this big, intimidating course and was concerned that it would be too much for her amateur skill level. I assured her that she would be just fine and no matter what she shot we would be there to support and encourage her and her UA teammates.

When Confidence and Excitement Strike

Riley’s practice sessions became much more intense and the self-applied pressure she put on herself in the tournaments leading up to this was starting to pay off. A good score in her match on Saturday brought her confidence and hope. She might not threaten to break 100 on Muirfield but she was no longer afraid. She was going to enjoy a day on what would certainly be one of the nicest courses she has played in her life and get to share it with her fellow Golden Bears and her family.

Then it rained…and rained…and rained some more. We kept checking the radar, hoping the greens, yellows and reds that signified heavy storms would head Eastward and bring clear skies to central Ohio.

At 9:40am the email arrived.

Unfortunately due to the inclement weather the course received this morning we are canceling the tournament today. Sorry for such a short notice. We were looking forward to a great day, hopefully we get better weather next year and can try it again!

When Riley finally woke up Sunday morning after a long, peaceful night of sleep, we shared with her that the tournament had been cancelled. Her face turned ashen and her shoulders slumped. Her eyes began to well up with tears so I quickly hugged her but it didn’t help. She quietly sobbed and lowered her head on my supportive shoulder. The same girl who was afraid to face the challenge of this elite golf course just 24-hours before was now heart-broken that she wasn’t going to get to experience the same course that Jack and Tiger and other PGA greats…and her father have played.

Are You In Control?

I told Riley that there was nothing that she could do about the weather. Was it unfortunate that her match was rained out? You bet. Was it the worst thing that could have happened today? Not by a long shot. Will there be bigger disappointments and let downs ahead? Of course. So what was the cancellation of the golf match in the big picture? A simple reminder of the old cliché that says

“You can’t control the things that happen to you but you can control the way you react to them.”

Riley golfIt might be a difficult lesson to learn for a 15-year-old but it sometimes is just as difficult to remember for grown adults. Think of something that frustrated you in the past week. How much control did you really have over the outcome?

As you head into the new week, what will you be focused on and what will you allow to distract you? Focus on those things which you can control and let go of the things you cannot. Your dedication to your family, finances and faith is yours alone. The amount of time you will dedicate to growing your business is a conscious decision. How you choose to follow-up with current clients, past clients and future customers could impact your immediate and long-term future.

I’ll keep encouraging Riley and her brother Ryan to stay focused on the things that matter and not worry about things like the weather that is out of their control. As Nicklaus once said, “in the game of golf, the only shot you can control is the next one.” Turns out that’s true in life too.

Sure, there is plenty you can control if you choose to. Check out this great list from the folks at Tiny Buddha – 50 Things You Can Control Right Now and see how many you can check off your list this week alone.

Focus on building relationships, solving problems and having fun and then just relax, because almost everything beyond those three things is out of your control.

Photo credit: Derek Gavey